Thursday, April 26, 2007
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Reminder to me - #12
Whether you know it or not
You are already there
You are the beauty...the
power...the wisdom...the
passion...the knowledge...
the fire...the calm...
the heart & the soul.
You are the star of your
being...all you have to do
is let yourself shine.
I don't know the author, but I love this.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Someone at Google Has a Great Sense of Humor!
Take 60 seconds to do this, I guarantee you will show someone else, it's too funny not to.
1. go to www.google.com
2. click on "maps," above the search bar...
3. click on "get directions"
4. type "New York" in the first box (the "from" box)
5. type "Paris" in the second box (the "to" box)
6. click on "get directions"
6. scroll down to step #23
1. go to www.google.com
2. click on "maps," above the search bar...
3. click on "get directions"
4. type "New York" in the first box (the "from" box)
5. type "Paris" in the second box (the "to" box)
6. click on "get directions"
6. scroll down to step #23
Friday, April 13, 2007
Change
Change is just a stepping stone .....
(everyone's answer is different so you fill in the rest!)
Sunday, April 8, 2007
Happy Easter!
Wishing Everyone a Very Happy Easter!
Q: How do you catch a unique bunny?
A: Unique up on it!!
Q. What happened when the Easter Bunny met the rabbit of his dreams?
A. They lived hoppily ever after!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Candy.
Candy who?
Candy Easter Bunny carry all dose treats in one basket?
Knock-Knock
Who's there?
Some bunny.
Some bunny who?
Some bunny is eating my Easter candy!
Saving the Easter Bunny
A man was blissfully driving along the highway, when he saw the Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the Bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place.
The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of the Bunny carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful Bunny was dead. The driver felt guilty and began to cry.
A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong.
"I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and killed it. There may not be an Easter because of me. What should I do?"
The woman told the man not to worry. She knew exactly what to do. She went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp, dead Bunny, and sprayed the entire contents of the can onto the little furry animal.
Miraculously the Easter Bunny came to back life, jumped up, picked up the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two humans and hopped on down the road. 50 yards away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned around, waved and hopped on down the road another 50 yards, turned, waved, hopped another 50 yards and waved again!
The man was astonished. He said to the woman, "What in heaven's name is in your spray can? What was it that you sprayed on the Easter Bunny?" The woman turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said: "Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."
Tuesday, April 3, 2007
Sunday, April 1, 2007
For Cat Lovers or Not
We've all had trouble with our animals, but I don't think anyone can top this one:
Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the feeling that my boss thinks I'm lying. On one re occasion, I had a valid reason but lied anyway, because the truth was just too darned humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head injury & I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I reasoned, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on the top of my head. The accident occurred mainly because I had given in to my wife's wished to adopt a cute little kitty. Initially, the new acquisition was no problem.
Then one morning, I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen. "Honey! The garbage disposal is dead again. Please come reset it."
"You know where the button is," I protested through the shower pitter-patter & steam. "Reset it yourself!"
"But I'm scared!" she persisted. "What if it starts going & sucks me in?"
There was a meaningful pause & then, "C'mon, it'll only take you a second."
So out I came, dripping wet & butt naked, hoping that my silent outraged nudity would make a statement about how I perceived her behavior as extremely cowardly. Sighing loudly, I squatted down & stuck my head under the sink to find the button. It is the last action I remember performing. It struck without warning & without any respect to my circumstances. No, it wasn't the hexed disposal, drawing me into its gnashing metal teeth. It was our new kitty, who discovered the fascinating dangling objects she spied hanging between my legs. She had been poised around the corner & stalked me as I reached under the sink. At the precise moment when I was most vulnerable, she leapt at the toys I unwittingly offered & snagged them with her needle-like claws. I lost all rational thought to control orderly bodily movements, blindly rising at a violent rate of speed, with the full weight of a kitten hanging from my masculine region. Wild animals are sometimes faced with a "fight or flight" syndrome. Men, in this predicament, choose only the "flight" option. I know this from experience. I was fleeing straight up into the air when the sink & cabinet bluntly & forcefully impeded my ascent. The impact knocked me out cold.
When I awoke, my wife & the paramedics stood over me. Now there are not many things in this life worse than finding oneself lying on the kitchen floor butt naked in front of a group of "been-there, done-that" paramedics.
Even worse, having been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics were all snorting loudly as they tried to conduct their work, all the while trying to suppress their hysterical laughter...& not succeeding.
Somehow I lived through it all. A few days later I finally made it back in to the office, where colleagues tried to coax an explanation out of me about my head injury. I kept silent, claiming it was too painful to talk about, which it was. "What's the matter," they all asked, "cat got your tongue?" If they only knew!
Why is it that only the women laugh at this?
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