My response

i am sick and tired of everyone that is blasting o,j,he has a right to say what ever he wants to.this is a free country.or i thought it was .it is if it dont apply to o,j,.dont every one remember that his was aquited by a jury of his peers.he was framed big time by mark furmann & the whole la rest of them ,i hope i live long enough to finalt find out who really killed ron & nicole.ans as for goldman i am sorry for his lost but why would he want to publish a book that he fought so hard to keep from being published?. velma
#1 Comment from pasflash78 - 8/5/07 2:35 PM

 

I have to respond to this. First of all, just because he was acquitted, doesn't mean he is innocent.  I readily admit that I liked OJ Simpson when he was playing football. After watching the trial, listening to BOTH sides, reading about the evidence, I believe he did it. He was not framed.

Second, it is a FREE country & I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SAY HOW I FEEL TOO.

It is fact that OJ was abusive towards Nicole when they were married.  Did you know that even if you divorce an abusive spouse, there is a high probability that they will do something again? Have you ever been told by the police not to press charges because it only makes them angrier? Have you ever been told by the court that your children could be taken away from you because you didn't have the courage to leave? Never mind he was the one with the anger problem.

I have. First I stayed because I loved him. Then I stayed because I truly believed he would get "better". Then it was because I didn't have a job or money & I had a toddler & a baby at the time. 

Excuses - NO. If you haven't walked in my shoes, you have no right to judge.  What does an abusive woman look like to you? I grew up with commercials of a women with black eyes.  I was always waiting for the black eye.

No one ever explains that being pushed down the stairs, thrown over furniture, kicked in the stomach while pregnant, punching holes in the wall, leaving for days at a time, spending all the money is abusive (& more). To a person outside the situation, it is quite obvious that this is abuse. To the person who is being abused, this unfortunately becomes the norm. 

My relationship did not start out that way. He was charming, loving, romantic & my family loved him.  The first incident happened after about a year.  Then he came back with a dozen roses, gave the "I'm sorry, I'll never do it again" story & because I was in love with him, I wanted to believe him.  Now just repeat that pattern for another 15 years.

What I found out after separating from him, was that with an abusive relationship, things get worse, not better.  The abuser has to admit to having a problem & be willing to get help. It is a long road from there. Most guys can't even admit they have a problem. 

My ex was court ordered to go to anger management classes.  After the first meeting, he said he didn't have a problem & didn't go back.  The court did nothing. I have stacks of court orders that he has not followed & the court has done nothing about.

Being in an abusive relationship becomes very secretive & solitary.  You are too embarrassed to let anyone see the bruises. You have been told over & over that it was your fault for making him angry & you deserved it.  You lose your friends because he always starts a fight & you have to cancel all the time. Your family knows nothing because they think he is the greatest husband & in your mindset, you are too ashamed to tell them.  Your whole way of thinking centers around this person, how to make him feel better or how not to make him mad.

I remember screaming for someone to call 911, hoping one of the neighbors would hear. No one did. His family actually took me to the emergency room, but couldn't admit that their son had a problem. 

Going to court for the divorce was almost just as bad.  I was asked why I didn't leave (shouldn't they have asked him why he didn't get help?). No one believed my side of the story because, once again, he could be quite charming.  It took a couple of years of dealing with his lies & behavior for the court to finally see the truth.  Was I scared? I just had to look at his eyes, see the shift to anger & I would be terrified. Do I believe he would still come after me after all these years? Absolutely. Why? Because he can't control his anger & always took it out on me.  Would I fight back? You better believe it. 

That is what I see in OJ. That look. The acting. The denial. Every time he comes out in public, his behavior is even more ludicrous.

So my point of view comes from experiencing this first hand. I suggest you read up on people who are abusive - their behavior, their actions & then watch OJ.  Listen to women who have been abused. Your eyes may just open.

Tags: abuse, oj, response, experience